Am I cut out for this?

So here's a quick update on what's been going on at the Tomlinson household. I only have a short amount of time because I never know how long Inara will stay quiet and peaceful these days. Last night was a doozy, which is not good for my mommy self-esteem. I'm beginning to wonder if I'm cut out for this. For anyone thinking about having a baby, I recommend REALLY taking the time to think it through because while it's a true blessing to become a parent, it's definitely NOT an easy job. There are times that Shawn and I ask what we've gotten ourselves into. I know I'm beginning to doubt my "motherly instincts" that's for sure. And I just keep reminding myself that these are the easy times. Oh good god. Well, after a few nights of Inara sleeping on a good schedule for mommy and daddy, last night she decided she wasn't going to cooperate and sleep. She was fussy starting around 10:30pm. I was exhausted, so Shawn said he'd stay up with her. I felt bad because he stayed up with her the night before until 1:30, but I was so tired I took him up on the offer and headed to bed around 11:30. I woke up at 1:30am to a blood curdling scream. I found an exhausted Shawn and a red-faced Inara pacing the living room. I told Shawn I would take over and for him to head to bed. Afterall, he did have to go to work on Friday while I was at home all day with the little one. He went to bed and I fed the little vampire as we refer to her on such nights. After she ate, I would rock her and just when I would think I could move her to the bedroom, the kid would wake up screaming again. So Inara and I stayed up until 5am this morning. At 4 am, I started thinking about calling my mom to come put her to sleep. I don't know what it is about Grandma Nene, but she has the charm of getting Inara to sleep right away and for 3 hour blocks. When she finally went down at 5am, I decided to not call mom. Then Inara woke up at 6:20 to be fed yet again. I swear the kid is an eating machine the last two days. Let's hope she's just going through a growth spurt rather than this being her normal feeding schedule for the next few months. I decided to bite the bullet and called mom at 7am and asked for her help. You see I wanted Shawn to be able to get some sleep and I had a dentist appointment this morning at 9:30, so I didn't want to wake him and thought mom could sit with Inara until Shawn woke up later in the morning. Mom arrived around 7:30 and got "her angel" as she likes to call her right to sleep. Mom is a miracle worker!!! I ate breakfast and got ready to head out to the dentist. I am experiencing the worst pain I've had throughout my pregnancy and even the delivery because I have developed TMJ. My family doc diagnosed me last week when I went to see him. He said it is generally brought on by stress/tension and possibly grinding my teeth. Shawn says he hasn't heard me grinding my teeth at night but we've both been so exhausted that I wouldn't be surprised if I am indeed doing it. As for stress/tension, of course I've got that with a 3 week old. Show me a new mom who doesn't. So the orthodontist I saw today said I definitely am showing signs of TMJ with a displaced disc in my jaw bone, that he can see a wearing down of my teeth on the left side more than likely from grinding, and that all of this is what is creating my tension headaches the last 10 days. I got fit for a night plate which I will need to start wearing to prevent me from grinding my teeth in my sleep and hopefully realign my jawbone. There goes another 500 bucks. Shawn now calls me money bags with all the money we will be shelling out for my doctor bills and what not. At least, I now know what the heck is causing all the pain on the left side of my face though. It's been one heck of a weekend already and we still have one more day to go. Let's hope Inara has worn herself out the past 24 hours crying so much that tonight she'll actually sleep for longer than 30 minute increments. Cross your fingers.